Self Esteem

February seems to very much be all about self-esteem. Not only is it International Boost Self Esteem Month but it is also Plant the Seeds of Greatness Month.  Having healthy level of self-esteem gives you the confidence and ability to reach your full potential and perhaps even true greatness.

Self-esteem is essentially how we value and perceive ourselves. It can impact decision-making, relationships, motivation, emotional health and your overall well-being. The strongest influences on self-esteem are typically self-confidence, identity, feeling of belonging and a feeling of competence.

Healthy self-esteem means you

  • Trust your own judgment and are unconcerned when others do not agree
  • Do not dwell excessively about the past or what might happen in the future
  • Fully trust in your capacity to solve problems and take failure and difficulties in your stride
  • You consider yourself equal in dignity to others  
  • Accept differences in talent, personal prestige or finances without jealousy
  • Accept the value of other and take an interest in them
  • You are sensitive to the feelings and needs of others
  • Do not seek to prosper at others’ expense
  • Can work with others and voice descent without belittling yourselves or others

I have written several times about the difference between men and women and interestingly the sexes differ in how they derive self-esteem.  For men, accomplishing things and especially by themselves is a symbol of efficiency, power and competence. Their self-esteem is often career related. Men rarely talk about their problems unless they are looking for ‘expert’ advice. Asking for help when you can do something yourself is a sign of weakness or failure.

For women, their sense of self is defined through their feelings and their relationships. They often spend time supporting, nurturing and helping each other and experience fulfilment through sharing and relating. Communication is very important and talking, sharing and relating is how they feels good about themselves.

If you suffer from low self-esteem, then there are way to improve it. Firstly, recognise what you’re good at – we’re all good at something. Be tolerant and kind to yourself – we all make mistakes sometimes. Learn to be assertive and learn to say ‘no’ when you have to. Challenge and stretch yourself to do more and be better.

Hypnotherapy can help with boosting your confidence, improving self-image and exploring the roots of any specific concerns. If you think I can help then get in touch.

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